Do you actually want to know what grinds my gears? Well do ya? Yeah? Well guess what, it's people who complain!!! I mean come on, complaining has got to be one of the most annoying things ever. And we ALL do it! Everyone needs to have something to complain about, and there's some people who aren't happy unless they are complaining! They probably annoy me most, but I also don't like people who don't complain enough cause chances are they're bottling it up and then one day will explode all over your ass and then you'll complain about them complaining and that usually puts you and them in bad moods, who will brush off that negative emotion on other people, resulting in a slow and negative spread of the complaining and bad humour like some kindof virus, ergo if its a virus then its bad, and so complaining is bad!
Complaining... let's look that up in the dictionary:
1. to express dissatisfaction, pain, uneasiness, censure, resentment, or grief; find fault: He complained constantly about the noise in the corridor.
2. to tell of one's pains, ailments, etc.: to complain of a backache.
3. to make a formal accusation: If you think you've been swindled, complain to the police.
More often than not people complain regarding definition 1 above. There's many other words which are frequently used instead of complaining: bitching, moaning, pulling out of one's arse, whinging, nagging, grumbling, bitching, etc. More often than not "complaining" (the verb, not the word itself) is most commonly associated with young people. I mean let's face it, young people can be bitches when it comes to bitchin'! I'm allowed say that since I'm nearly 19 and won't be the half-teen half-adult age of 18, where you're simply just a baby adult.
What right do people have to complain, most of the time it's about stupid bitchy stuff like Paris Hilton, or people on the bus, or stupid TV shows or something. Why can't people complain about serious stuff like War, Famine or whatever. Of course there are people who think they're complaining about serious stuff, they're called "Protesters" kids. They think that what they're doing is complaining about something serious but in reality they're just a nuisance, stopping traffic or boycotting some product or something. All they're doing is slowing down the economy and giving other people something to complain about, meaning they will then complain about protesters by protesting and hence will piss off other people who will complain and the whole thing will eventually come full circle.
It's interesting that the things people complain about is rarely gender dependent. Men complain about women and women usually complain about men. They only time you'll have men complaining about men and women complaining about women is if they're gay. Wait.... strike that, women always complain about other women, it's one of their favourite things to do. And in fact.... men never bitch about other men. It's a simple case of buying the bloke a beer and things usually work out. If not, a bloodthirsty battle in the gladiator arena usually settles the score should absolute clarity on the issue be required (and in that case the dispute is usually over a woman, hence satisfying condition 1 of men bitching about women). You never see women settle they're differences like that, they just keep it to themselves choosing to bitch about someone in secret, and they never want that person to know. LOOK AT ME!! I'm doing what I just described what men do, I'm complaining about women! Maybe I'll dedicate Issue 15 to that topic...
So enough of women for now... how does one go about complaining?
Firstly, its essential and I mean essential that you find something to bitch about which you feel absolutely passionate about. There's no value whatsoever in moaning about something that you don't feel for. Once you've got that you have two choices: (a) research the topic to ensure that you can make a carefully constructed concise complaint or (b) do absolutely no research whatsoever and let your deep rage on the matter form the basis of the argument. After that is decided you need a medium to effectively transmit your argument. The internet, a public forum(particularly if you're live on TV or receiving an award in front of a crowd or something cause you have SO much power at that moment!), a newspaper or anything like that is ideal. Finally, decide the basis for argument: personal experience or no experience and just think you have experience and hence justly complain about it.
Speaking about that briefly, is there anyone who can justifiably complain? Well kindof, if say a guy gets his penis cut off, he can rightly complain about having his penis cut off. Realistically, one can only complain justly about something if it is "out of the norm", like in the above example. Complaining about "the traffic" for something isn't justified, because it happens to everyone, its an accepted way of life. HOWEVER, if you are sitting next to a woman on the bus and she decides to plop out her enormous left breast right beside you so she can feed her child then YES you can complain justly!!!! (That last instant was me, see a previous issue of GMG for further information) Goddamn, I'm complaining about women again!! Really though, I love ya's so don't take it to heart....
Finally then, what's to be done about all this complaining? How do we smote the complainers, cripple the bitches (not women, I mean those who complain!) and decimate the bemoaners?
I say we lock them up together, then they can complain together, no doubt about their predicament of being locked up together. And of course we should separate men from women, not in attempt to deny them sex or anything, but then they will we want to be able to moan about the opposite gender amongst their fellow brothers and sisters in privacy...of a sorts.
~The Damo
2 comments:
Interesting blog.
I hugely disagree with your view of protesters. They don't think, they know what they're protesting about. Or are you forgetting the numerous protests over the years for various reasons, be it make poverty history, against the war in Iraq or trying to keep a hospital open. Protests are needed. Or would you like to, say, have been working most of your life in terrible conditions, for unholy hours with crappy pay. Not to mention people struggling for the vote. In my opinion they are far more than just a nusiance.
I bitch about guys as much as women. And generally the women I bitch about I don't care if they find out, cause they probably know.
I don't see what's wrong with complaining about something that's considered part of the norm. You want the bad traffic and transport situation to improve, or various other crappy siuations considered everyday, you complain.
You're not supposed to take the blog seriously!
Of course I know protesting is good, and I secretly point that out in the section where I talk about "making an argument". I'm trying to suggest there that in the case of THIS blog, I haven't researched the topic or put any effort into preparation, hence I've written the blog purely from the point of view of someone who is simply enraged by complaining, and ironically is complaining himself!!
Likewise with the point of gender bitching, the stereotype of women is that they bitch about so and so because they didn't get invited them to Charmel's super sweet sixteen, and the idea that the sexes frequently bitch about each other is from the idea of guys siding with guys and girls with girls in an argument against each other.
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