Grinds My Gears!! - Issue 3

This is slightly different as I'll be bashing two different topics in this one, so we'll just take it as it comes.

Dublin Bus

This isn't so much a gripe at the company, it's more the people than anything else. What particularly annoys me is when people, with money, queue in the ticket line, and hold up everyone in the ticket line who actually has a ticket. That's part of the point of the ticket, so you can get on faster. It's invisible to the naked eye as they conceal their change in their hands, just as easily as one could conceal a ticket, and suddenly, when you're the guy behind them, they stop moving and you realise that they are waiting for a break in the other goddamn queue!!!

Another thing that I need to address is people with headphones. Now I use headphones on the bus aswell, but what I'm on about is those who have the volume up to the max, so you can hear what they are listening to and should they sit beside you, the only way you can indicate that you want to get off is by lifting your bag up off the floor and leaning to one side. God help those who have no bag.

That's another thing...bags! I carry one, sometimes two bags, depending on the day, with me on the bus. Should I be sitting down I'll rest one on my knees, the other at my feet, not like some who take up the whole seat with their bags or their change purses. Last week for instance, a woman got on with what could only be a full weeks shopping and casually occupied the whole side row on the left near the front of the bus (this was one of the older buses with two doors). Like what the fuck? That's what the baggage hold is for!

One more thing has got to be people that brings unfolded buggies onto the bus when the bus is already crammed with people like a tin of sardines. This has only become an issue since the 'buggy/wheelchair' space was introduced. Before that people had no problem folding up the buggy. But not now. By leaving the buggy open, they use up a significant portion of quality standing space. If they only folded it, and put it on the luggage rack, I'm sure someone would quite happily give up their seat for the mother/father with the child.

All of these issues depend greatly on what bus route you get and where you get it from. If you want to experience any of these problems just get one of the Lucan buses from Westmoreland Street, or if you want to experience all of these problems, try (and I mean TRY!) to get the 25A from Heuston Station.

MTV

I think the issue of MTV is one which everyone is already well aware of. Nevertheless, I shall try to construct a coherent argument on why it annoys me so much. I suppose a good place to start is in the stations name: MTV - Music Television. Music Television. Once more just in case you didn't get it: M-U-S-I-C Television. Now that that's been properly addressed I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this. Remember back in the day, when we had Nirvana with the sensational "Smells Like Teen Spirit", and how it was on almost once every half hour (and before you say anything I realise I was about 4 or 5 at the time but I remember seeing the song, sure I didn't know what it was about then but I can't really say I'm any further enlightened today either!). That was when MTV played music. Now I know they try to do that now, with lame request shows and what not but seriously, the only channel you can see music on is E4, or if you are a Sky Digital fan you have an array of over 20 different pure music channels to choose from, be it the soft classics of 'Magic' or the heavy anthems of 'Kerrang!'.

So what is MTV now. Well that's hard to say really. A reality tv channel...that's fairly accurate, as I can only think of "South Park" and "Drawn Together" off the top of my head which aren't reality tv in the usual sence. I'll do my best now to list of the reality tv shows on offer courtesy of MTV: Newlyweds, MADE, Pimp My Ride (UK), Date My Mom, NeXt, Laguna Beach, Little Talent Show, The Osbournes (when it was on), The Ashely Simpson Show, Punk'd, Viva la Bam, Dismissed, Making the Band, Sweet 16, The Real World, Run's House, Meet the Barkers, Boiling Point, Wanna Come in? and so on. With the exception of maybe one or two of these programmes, the rest are pretty rubbish, taking into account the vast array of spoiled bitched we have who think they are too good for the world, the innumerable white blokes who think they're black and fail to pull it off, the bottom of the barrel celebrities (Jessica and Ashlee Simpson come to mind) and so on. MTV has come under extremely heavy criticism for the way it's now directing it's tv. To make matters worse, MTV UK then invests in the same disastrous programming such as Pimp My Ride and Date My Mom. I don't need to point out how terrible Westwood is at trying to be like X. On the point of Date My Mom, I have to say it is quite possibly the most "wrong" programme in existence. Young guys going out with older women just so they can get at their daughters.....please.

That's not to say all these programmes are bad. Boiling Points, MADE and Punk'd have their moments, though I can't say too much for others. I mean how many times to we need to see domestically challenged Jessica Simpson try to fry a piece of chicken or see some lesbian say "Next" to some other girl because she doesn't wear a bra or see two people bitchin' at each other in Laguna Beach. It's all close up there with the biggest disease of them all - Big Brother. Big Brother is like the AIDS of tv - you can't stop it, it just spreads to everyone and everywhere, with other reality tv like cancer - you can treat it with some doses of Mythbusters or American Chopper. Once you're hooked on BB there's no treatment.

If I could purge the world of these programmes I would, but sadly I'm only one man.

Who will join me?

Probably not you....

Ace Rimmer will me help me!!!

~Damien

P.S. - Which of the following do you prefer as an opposite article to GMG, it'll be about things I like and things that make me happy. The choices are: "Lubs My Gears", "Tickles My Pickle" or "Flying High in the Sky"?