Facial Hair

I figured, since I have now harvested a successful goatee for 2 years, that I should perhaps write a blog about managing facial hair, and how to achieve the best results. As such, I've divided this piece into 3 main segments:

• Making the choice


• Cultivating your choice


• Managing your choice

Making the Choice

The decision to embark in the world of facial hair is not easy one, until you've successfully completed step two in this guide, you will most likely face abuse from your peers as you attempt to change your image. Unlike, say a tatoo, facial hair isn't permanent, so you can alter your choice as I will illustrate later on. I've attached a picture which to my knowledge shows most variations on facial hair. There is of course nothing to stop you coming up with your own, but if you're new to this I suggest making a selection based on the below diagram. (You need to click HERE to enlarge).

After you've made your choice, I would suggesting consulting with a friend or loved one for their opinion. It IS a big step, and ridicule is a certain biproduct if you fail to succeed in your attempt. Facial hair is afterall a staple of your intent to stand out from the crowd. There are so many more clean shaven people out there and this is you making a change. I personally had the idea of growing a goatee for a Halloween costume, only later to find that people actually liked it and hence I kept it (also I found that it was great for stroking when I was in a pensieve mood). You, on the other hand, may not be so lucky. So think carefully before you proceed to the next step.

Cultivation

Perhaps the most important of all the steps, everything can go wrong with cultivating your choice. To make it clearer, I'm talking about actually GROWING your facial hair. All men after they reach that age realise that shaving can become a bit of a pain in the arse at times. We, unlike women, are fortunate enough to only have to shave above our necks on a regular basis.

The first, and certainly easiest step, is to simply not shave. How long you ask? Well I would suggest anywhere in the region of two-three weeks, depending on what you're going for. If say you're going for a tache of some sort I would wait until it is well grown in, shaving too early can make it look scrawny and will entice laughter and ridicule. If you're going for something around the chin, you don't need to wait as long. The main problem with not shaving however is that you can look like a right scruffy bastard, so sacrifices may need to be made on socialising fronts if necessary. If prompted, state that you intend to grow a (insert facial hair) rather than say you're just not shaving.

Once your face has reached maturity, it's time to slice and swipe. If you happen to be unfamiliar with the art of shaving, I will direct you now to a blog I wrote some time ago: The_Perfect_Shave

This stage is key. One slip here and all you're work will be for NOTHING. At this stage, you should have been day dreaming long and hard about your new facial hair, so you should have some idea of how to proceed in crafting it. When shaving at this point, a general word of advice is to start high on the cheeks. No one actually lets hair grow their so its good location to line-up your first motion. From there I can only advise that you keep a steady hand whilst you swing your razor. If you feel a little unsure, it might be helpful to perhaps draw a sketch, or jot down each movement you're going to make. Think of it like a game of chess, each stroke of your blade is setting up the check-mate, i.e. your finished product.

I would strongly recommend a blade that can be adjusted or has a single blade at the rear for any particular fine motions.

Management

If you've got this far, you've done well. By now you've likely braved the public opinion on your new facial enhancement and are now faced with the task of keeping it up to scratch. From her I would recommend some key purchases; a trimmer (I have a Philips one) and also an electric razor is a good investment, one with an accuracy enhancer (or in English, a flat head). If these aren't available, you'll have to make do with a scissors.

On the technology side of it, a good idea is to start at the maximum depth with the trimmer, and then work your way down the settings until you reach the desired substance of depth. Remember that the fullness and strength of your facial hair is highly important to its social success, so make sure that you don't trim it down too much. This is of course facial hair dependent. Having the electric razor flat head can help control those hard to reach areas, and help define the curves if there are any - which there usually are. Additionally, if you're going a bit bushy with your choice, regular combing is a must if you want to avoid unwanted outward growing and just general untidyness.

Using a scissors is quite an undertaking, and one slip up with the dual blades could ruin all your hard work up to this point. My advice is to take it one snip at a time, being careful not to take too much off. You really should strive to own a trimmer as soon as possible. Controlled shaving with a regular blade should be undertaken at your own preferred intervals, and should only be used to manage large areas of your face that are to remain clean shaven.

Ultimately, if it all goes wrong, all the damage to your face can be rectified with a few swipes of a razor. What can't be repaired so easily is the damage that will be done to your image in the public domain. FAILING at facial hair is one of the worst things any man can experience, almost as bad as being left at the altar and just worse that drinking a warm beer. Remember, the success of your facial hair is directly proportional to your the care and attention you give it, and inversely proportional to your looks on a bad day, i.e. if you can still look smashing on a bad day, then facial hair is not for you, but with facial hair, you can still look great if you look like shit on a bad day. Trust me, that's how it is.

~The Damo

The Art of Shaving

The perfect shave. That is what all men strive for. In my 5-6 years of having to shave frequently I’ve tried many a technique and apparatus to try and achieve the closest shave (like the Gillette ads always say) to make my face feel as smooth as a baby’s bottom – not that I’d know what that feels like. The idea of the perfect shave has also gained added value for me, since I am now sporting a perfectly cultivated goatee. A goatee which has been in the works for almost a year now I might add.

Obviously the angle of this blog reflects on the male perspective of shaving, since I am fortunate enough only to have to shave above my neck so sorry to anyone who thought I was giving tips on shaving anywhere else.

So what is it that I think is essential for the perfect shave? Well ignoring a brand of shaving foam – which are generally the same anyway except for smell – both a good razor and aftershave are required to give the overall perfect sensation. Shaving foam, whilst essential for raising the hairs to ensure the blade removes as much hair as possible, should really only be used in my opinion to gauge your progress as you carefully make your way around and across your face.

Any aftershave is suitable, again the main difference being smell (of which I go for the nicer smelling ones) but I myself prepare to go for balms. It is essential to make sure that when applying the balm you cover everywhere you have shaved, otherwise it can be apparent to others that you don’t value nor do you care about the way you shave.

The most important element of the trio is no doubt the blade, which is the binding element in ensuring the closest shave. I began my shaving career with a Mach 3, which for many years was the shaving razor for men, the Coca-Cola of razor blades if you will. There were two further iterations of the Mach 3 in its lifespan, Mach 3 Turbo and Mach 3 Nitro, all of which added to the better shave. I myself have now upgraded to Gillette Fusion and since then Fusion Power and Fusion Power Stealth have hit the market.

The technique (and secret) of a good shave is this: the blade is a car, and you are driving it across your face. Why do you think the previous ones had “Turbo” and “Nitro” in the names? Those words are associated with automobiles. In fact it’s practically mandatory to make the “Vrrroooommmm” noise in your head as the blade glides across your face. Not only that but the Turbo was a sporty-red colour and the Nitro was a popping crystal-green. Those colours just scream speed! Now with Stealth they’re upgrading the speed of shaving to a Stealth Bomber, i.e. you should imagine a bomber flying across your face eliminating the hairy targets below. We can make shaving a game like that, and the game ain’t over till every last hair is eliminated. Fusion and Fusion Power added variety to the shaving experience by adding in the single blade on the back to account for those hard-to-reach places. I have personally found great use in them when precision shaving is needed to keep the shape of my goatee consistent. If you are completely clean shaven, then it is essential to begin your shave at the sides, ensuring you get clear uninterrupted sweeps to the chin allowing for maximum velocity of the blade. From there you can tidy up above the lip and then begin the back strokes from the neck upwards. If however you are of the bearded variety like me, I recommend starting above the lip, then a quick tidy around the bearded area before beginning the long strokes. Ultimately, if your initial strokes are unsuccessful in removing all traces of hair, there is nothing to stop you from making a second lap or second bombardment of the difficult areas.

Post shave you should be able to move the tips of your fingers around your face, feeling nothing but smooth skin. Once you can do that you can park your razor in its garage/hanger/case for the next time…

~The Damo